Political correctness
a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

Laundry

Song: Naked
Artist: Avril Lavigne
Album: Let Go
Released: 2002

Today’s Quote: History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on [...]

Thoughts From a Wandering Mind

Song: Ballroom Blitz
Artist: Tia Carrere
Album: Wayne’s World
Released: 1992

Today’s Quote: “It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.” ~ Written in the dust on the back of a bus in Wickenburg, Arizona

Ran across these the other day. I think some of them have wandered through my mind at one time or another. As [...]

Consultants

Song: Tired Of Waiting For You
Artist: The Kinks
Album: Kinks-Size
Released: 1965

Today’s Quote: “Half-assed efforts yield half-assed results.” ~ Kahuna Papa

A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organization.
Last week, we took some friends to a new restaurant, “Steve’s Place”, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his [...]

H-U-G ... what?

Song: Sunshine Of Your Love
Artist: Cream
Album: Disreali Gears
Released: 1967

Today’s Quote: “When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.” ~ P. J. O’Rourke

I did a double take when I saw this truck ahead of me on my way to work this morning.

Mandatory fun accomplished

Song: Centerfield
Artist: John Fogerty
Album: Centerfield
Released: 1985

Today’s Quote: “Half this game is ninety percent mental.” ~ Yogi Berra

I was directed to attend a baseball game. The email stressed the importance of participating in this “exercise.” I’m not sure what he meant by that but I’m sure it’s something from a management seminar or something. I did [...]

MSPB Relocated

Song: I Am…I Said
Artist: Neil Diamond
Album: Stones
Released: 1970

Today’s Quote: “Bare breasts are viewed as a totally natural state on the beach. But public morality follows people’s confidence and optimism in their wealth and lifestyle.” ~ Dr. Guy Fournier, French academic commenting on the decline in the number of women who sunbathe topless on French beaches

This [...]

Once toxic waste, now OK

Song: Stand By Me
Artist: Ben E. King
Album: Don’t Play That Song
Released: 1960

Today’s Quote: “This country’s obsession with not uttering naughty words and not talking about s-e-x is borderline psychotic. Strike that, it is psychotic.” ~ Robert Thompson, a professor of popular culture and television at Syracuse University in a commentary about why the major networks [...]

Double-Secret Probation

Song: Let It Ride
Artist: Bachman-Turner Overdrive
Album: Bachman-Turner Overdrive II
Released: 1973

Today’s Quote: “What do I know about sex? I’m a married man.” ~ Tom Clancy

Did I ever remove Wendy’s from Double-Secret Probation? I didn’t think so. Well, I’m going to keep them on the list a bit longer. I chose a nearby Wendy’s for my noon [...]

190

Song: Sweet City Woman
Artist: The Stampeders
Album: Against the Grain
Released: 1971

Today’s Quote: “When I became a nudist, my slightly-elevated blood pressure dropped.” ~ Robert Denker, profile in N 27.4

I stepped on my bathroom scale today and was pleasantly surprised. According to my scale, I now weigh 190 naked pounds. That’s down from around 200 or more [...]

Paris for President?

Song: Elected
Artist: Alice Cooper
Album: Billion Dollar Babies
Released: 1973

Today’s Quote: “I have come to the conclusion that politics are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.” ~ Charles De Gaulle

Paris Hilton Responds to McCain Ad
See Paris Hilton Responds to McCain Ad and more funny videos on FunnyOrDie.com
See more funny videos at Funny or [...]